Hawai'i

I know everyone has been waiting for an update...let's be honest, pictures...but I've been recuperating from getting more sun than the last 5 years of my life combined. Seriously, my body has stored up it's beautiful rays and I could go for another 5 years of only seeing the sun when forced to walk from where I park to the closest building with air conditioning.

It was beautiful, fun, exotic (not extremely, but we're from Utah so do the math), relaxing, and part of me wishes we had found jobs and stayed. I could be a waitress (ha!) and Matt surely could find work at one of the thousand ABC Stores in Waikiki alone. For those who haven't had the pleasure of visiting the Waikiki vicinity, there is literally an ABC Store on every corner. There was a spot on the main drag (Kalakaua Dr) that you could stand there and see three stores from that single spot! It was worse than Starbucks in Seattle (I'm dead serious). What's an ABC store? Oh, well it's like a 7-11 but better. They sell liquor (mini-bottle leis anyone? They have those!), clothes (over-priced, but everything was), and souvenirs galore!

However, the exorbitant use of vowels in the Hawaiian language and street names, was enough to make us miss home, and the simplistic (anyone could sound out) street names.

The whole week was an adventure, but started with flying. I think I married the only person I've ever met who hasn't flown on a big-ol'-plane before. I've flown a lot, starting at a young age. I've never flown over an ocean for 5 hours, so I was a bit nervous. (Crash into the wide open ocean? Not for me, please! The idea of crashing into water and possibly surviving only to be floating somewhere in the 2500+ mile stretch between Hawaii and SoCal, and eventually eaten by sea life? Yeah, I'd rather crash into the side of the mountain and die on impact). Matt was a trooper and didn't voice or display one bit of nervousness about flying. Our first plane was a wimpy SkyWest (wimpy, yes, it holds merely 68 seats). The second was quite large, bigger then I've ever flown on, even on my flight to NYC. What kind of plane, you ask? I haven't the slightest, because I'm not a things-with-engines geek. It held 7 seats across a row and at least 42 (where we sat) rows. Plus, Delta offers free movies on the flight to/from Honolulu! Sleep on the plane? Not when I could be watching Bride Wars or Confessions of a Shopaholic! (You know, since they're chick flicks and Matt won't watch them with me)

My favorite part was stepping out of the airport in LA for a quick drag, and Matt experiencing true humidity (Utah doesn't ever get true humidity, we're a desert dammit!). Little did he know Hawai'i would be worse and it wouldn't be early morning before the heat compounded it.

Enough of my commentary, although you'll get some narration with the pictures. (Because there are almost 300 pics I took I'm going to make a post for each day with a few pics. They will be post-dated to correlate with the actual days so stayed tunned and scroll down!)

Hawaii Day 4

Sunday, was totally a chill out and relax day. We went to some presentation in the morning to get us a car rental, and the rest of the day was us being lazy :) I enjoyed playing in the ocean, but couldn't convince Matt to join me, so he played in the sand & collected mini sea shells.






And when in doubt...there's alway's a Denny's nearby:

Saturday was part relaxing, part recuperation from the night before. What better way to do so than sleeping in followed by some shopping, time strolling the beach and enjoying the night life? We watched the sunset, then ate at Hulu Grill above Duke's and the atmosphere was wonderful with live local music.

Hawaii Day 2

Our second day there was a long, full day. We decided to hike the Diamond Head Crater, followed by a short beach visit for me, then dinner at the Top of Waikiki (rotating fancy restaraunt) and drinking at The Red Lion while listening to a local band.

Hawai'i-we have arrived

Hours on a plane, meant this was a refreshing view. This was Matt's initial encounter with any ocean. We ate at Lulu's just down the block from our hotel, and the open-air seating overlooks the beach, with live music.



Our hotel room view (you can see the ocean...not that we paid for a partial ocean view)

Too Excited for Well Placed Words

I just got word from the Hubs that he got days off next month.....so we can go to Hawaii! I wanna jump up and down screaming with delight and excitement. However, I'm at work right now...so this will have to do. This will serve as our belated honeymoon and an early first anniversary for us. This economy in a rut thing, is working out for us kind of poor people. Seven months ago the same package would have cost us more than double! And since I can't actually squeal out the emotions I have right now....this video will have to do:

It's been so long, I forgot I was missing it

Why didn't anyone remind me? I had forgotten what it was like to sleep without excessive noise permeating every moment of the night. Resulting in the zombie-like sleep I must have been getting for well over two years now. The non-stop, round-the-clock, rush of traffic on Highland Drive, bouncing in through our single pane, kept no noise out and barely the cold, windows.

I still have my sleeping issues....because, I'm me and it wouldn't make sense for everything to get better. However, now that we officially live in the 'burbs, it's eerily quiet at night. Almost deafeningly silent, laying there in bed, trying to fall asleep. It's the lack of street traffic, heard through thin windows, so it feels like the cars are IN the same room. It's the multiple walls and vast expanses (it's a general exaggeration, but a quite accurate comparison to our old place) in-between the bedroom and the TV room where Hubs is watching TV. It's the lack of people walking home from the bars at closing time, drunk, and talking loudly as they ever-so-slowly pass the building's parking lot.

Instead, peaceful, suburbia silence. It is this beautiful thing, contained in such an environment I tend to loathe, that finds me waking now, knowing...better yet, feeling...like I got into a deep sleep (even if it may be a short one).

One year older, and wiser too....

Well, maybe not the later. Sunday I got a year older, and I think I like this new number. 24 is not nearly as appealing as 23 was/is, but I think I will stick to this number a few years, until I can no longer get away with it (in the same fashion that some women are 29 or 39 for 10 years-sometimes more).

I normally don't make a big fuss about my birthday, but this year, we had some friends over for a small gathering. I enjoyed the night very much. We managed to forget to serve the birthday cake, and didn't get a single picture. But it happened, and when years from now I wonder why there's no pictures of my "first" 24th Birthday, I'll have to turn to my blog to remember.

It's easier this way, to stay one age for a while. When I start to think about turning 25 next year, the panicked pressure starts to rise in my chest, reminding me of all the things I've not accomplished that I thought I would have by age 25. So....rationally speaking, if I stay 24 come next spring, I don't have to panick about those things now....right?

Bittersweet Goodbye

Friday we hauled out most of our belongings and moved on to the next chapter in our lives. It was definitely bittersweet for me: leaving a place were Matt & I became a "we", but I also hated living in a cramped little apartment. We made some wonderful memories there. I was almost teary as I took one last look at the building and drove off Saturday for the last time. But....I took some pictures, so that we can show our future children where we lived. It sounds silly, but as a child I always loved seeing pictures of my parent's lives before I was in it. Seeing them so young, and seeing the path that led them to the family we were (at the time).

Now I'm back, at a familiar house, my Mother's. It was the only house we ever lived in for more than a few years growing up. It's my third round at this house, but this time is quite different. It's slowly becoming our home, with our belongings in it. Last night I was packing up most of her kitchen, and it seemed strange to pack up these things that have been there for the last 12+ years. I kept thinking "when family comes over, they won't know where to look for things" and "will they be upset that my Mom's stuff isn't there". It's also very unnerving to be usurping my Mother, and taking over the master bedroom that's always been her's, and moving her into the spare room. It's necessary for us to live there, but it feels so instinctively wrong, and I worry that she feels usurped. I hope that we can make it as welcoming as she did over the years; the gathering spot for family events.

My Miscellaneous Life

So I haven't had much to blog about lately, because my life gets pretty boring sometimes. Not that I don't stay busy, but the busy stuff is boring. I can't figure out how to spin "moving at the end of the month" into something you'd actually be entertained by when reading. So I give up and here you go:




We are moving at the end of the month, and I don't have the guts to start packing yet. It would mean I would have to inventory things in my life, and decide what crap is staying and what crap....is just crap...that needs thrown out! It's my least favorite part of moving, even if it suits my neurosis of unattachment to inanimate objects (unlike my husband who saves everything...and I mean everything...an empty cigarette pack? there's like 3 on one of our tables right now. Throw them out when they are EMPTY...dearest). I like unpacking, because it allows me the chance to organize things into the best place possible in the new room (control freak?). The actual moving isn't bad...I get to break a real sweat, and feel like I did something useful...plus the burden of lifting large, heavy objects will mostly be placed on my wonderful husband. This move is also compounded with having to organize and store my mother's belongings, since we are moving into her house. So I will have to suffer through the packing process twice, but at least with hers I'm not obligated to take stock of the objects and decide "keep or toss"...it's all keep (the glass is half full).



In other news, I gave into peer pressure and joined Facebook. What can I say? My will power is only so strong.

Tag..I'm it

I've been tagged by my sister Kas

List of eight tag:
Post rules on your blog
Answer the five '8' items
Let each person you tag know by leaving them a comment

My '8' for each category are in no particular order, and I'm breaking one of the rules, because I don't feel like tagging anyone (oh, deal with it, yes, I'm a party pooper)

8 Favorite TV shows:
(I can only pick 8?!?!? Fine, then I will pick from the current shows [ie: still runs yearly])

• Grey's Anatomy (okay, this really is my #1)
• Big Brother
• Private Practice
• Bones
• Closer
• House
• 24
• Ugly Betty

8 things I did yesterday:

• worked
• ate a caesar salad
• contemplated joining Facebook & decided against
• visited Matt at work
• watched Big Bang Theory (because I'm not caught up on 24 yet)
• laughed
• checked the mail
• cried

8 favorite restaurants:

• Belgian Waffle & Omelet Inn (Midvale, UT)
• Applebee's (anywhere, USA)
• Charlie's (Seattle, WA)
• Broadway Grill (Seattle, WA)
• Blimpie's (shut up, it's a fast-food restaurant)
• El Chihuahua's (Holladay, UT....I will miss being 1.5 blocks from it!)
• Chili's (old school Chili's when they had awesome blossoms...but I still like it)
• Village Baker (90th South and Redwood, UT)

8 Things I'm looking forward to:

• being pregnant (NO, I'm not currently pregnant, so back off!)
• starting a family in the future
• owning a home
• Matt & I sitting in our rockin' chairs on the front porch in our 'Golden Years'
• taking an Alaskan cruise (which was supposed to be our "honeymoon")
• Dakota's first birthday (My aunts always remember stuff about my first few years, so I'm taking a page from their book[s])
• re-decorating my Mom's house with our stuff when we move in next month
• taking the new car off-road and testing it's 4WD

8 things on my wish list:

• owning a home (I know this is a repeat, but I really really really want it!)
• a Ferrari (Red, circa 1980s)
• the Amazon Kindle or Kindle 2
• for us to get out of Iraq (oh wait, that one is being granted by August 2010!)
• travel Europe with Matt
• world domination (what? a girl can dream can't she?)
• to lose 30 lbs. (notice it's on the wish list)
• enough money to live comfortably, and not paycheck-to-paycheck

If you've read this and want to do your own, consider yourself tagged...

Awwww Snap

I was recently prompted by our current situation to look at Matt and say "Holy shit! We're grown-ups!?!" And, no, this isn't at all based on the fact that I turn 24 in just over a month. [I know that's not old, but when I was a teenager, anything close to or over the age 25, seemed forever and a day away]

Sometimes life throws you curve balls, and you hit them, so it's a good thing.

My mother is investing in a job opportunity out of state, which means she's moving...out of state. [This comes after years of demands that her children not move/live out of state, because she didn't want to be far away from her (future)grandchildren]. She has graciously offered up her house to us [the upstairs since the basement is rented]. So....this past week has been spent planning the move, and since her house is not within a mile of Matt's work, he will no longer be able to walk to work. That meant we needed a second vehicle.

About four months ago we had been looking at buying a bigger vehicle for me [thinking ahead to the next few years when we start having children]. At the time, we decided that we would wait, until it was more affordable for us. Saturday we ventured out onto the car lots looking primarily for a commuter car for Matt, because we didn't really want to be spending too much right now. However, we found a brand new 2008 model of the same vehicle we almost bought four months ago.....for a $7,000 savings. Yes, $7,000 savings for waiting 4 months to buy it. Granted, we would have gone for the upgraded model with leather seats, but for $7k, I can deal with the cloth! [I will do a follow-up post with pics, when it's not raining on my new car!]

This is what hit me like a ton of bricks: we are buying new cars, moving, and really, seriously planning out our future. We were signing so many forms at the dealership like...well...like we we were

ALL

GROWN

UP

The Geek in Me

I read lots of regular fiction, because I can't handle westerns, romance, sci-fi, or most non-ficiton subjects. I don't like buying used or going to the library, because I like the smell of a new book...but I donate books I don't intend to keep to my local library, because when I was young I couldn't buy books @ $20 a pop, and was constantly at the library...it's my version of "giving back to the community".

As I write this, there is a finished puzzle on my coffee table that I did by myself on Sunday, in under 2.5 hours (we didn't time it, but that's our guess), while watching TV...and I buy the 5-pak (500 pc/puzzle) at Walgreens, because it's only $6.99.

I own an original Nintendo, and love to play Mario Bros. 3, but I also own Mario Bros. 1 (with DuckHunt, of course). I learned to play Star Wars Battlefront on an XBOX first, and then on Playstation 2 (and the sequel, Battlefront 2, which I'm currently re-obsessed with on PS2)....and I'm not even a Star Wars fan. I once spent weeks mastering the 100-man-melee on GameCube (with the princess, no less). [I can't tell you the name of the game...so I'm not that big of a geek...but I do know that some games are exclusive to their game systems, and some are made in multiple versions for each gaming system, and they look different on XBOX, PS2, PC, etc....which anyone who isn't slightly geeky would not necessarily know that] .


I like to sew, even though I haven't for a while (because we just honestly don't have the room that projects tend to overtake). I recovered our couch in microfiber suede & have made lots of quilts (hand-tied with yarn, because I'm too lazy to make them a true "quilt") ...I can sew buttons back on, but don't ask me to hem something because I take my pants down the street and pay the $10 to have them hemmed.

I've been told by some people that one of these things makes me geeky (them only knowing about one of these)...so what does the combination of these things make me? Seriously? Because it's not like I know all the html codes, the difference in a processor & RAM, or every part in a car's engine, or quote lines from Star Wars or Star Trek, or know everything about the newest iPhone or similar star-status cell phone (I text, and make calls from my phone, and I can handle that). Maybe the definition of "geek" has changed since I was in high school...even though that was only 6 years ago?

I think it's healthy to have interest in lots of things, even if that makes me a GEEK!

Dear Loved One,

Happy Birthday. You would have been 26 today. Last month was the 9th anniversary, and I thought of you that entire day. I think of you often, and how unfair it was that your family had to lose you so young, to lose you at all. You were the closest thing I ever had to a big brother, and the closest thing I had to a normal brother. The thing is, you treated me like I was your little sister, and not just your little sister's friend (at least it seemed that way to me). I often think back to your family's trip that I was invited on, and you giving me your sweater because I was cold. Such a simple gesture, but sincere and kindhearted...enough that I can recall it now just shy of 10 years later. That was your essence: sincere, kindhearted, loving. Though you were only in my life for a short period of time, you made a huge impact in it, and the loss of you changed they way I looked at the world, how I looked at life.

Even though I haven't been to see you in years, it's not that I don't think about you, and miss you. It's merely that after you were gone, I hurt for so long, not just because you were gone....but your family was like my "other" family, and it hurt to see them hurt.

Please forgive me for not visiting more often, and enjoy this day that should be celebrated for you. You may no longer be here in body, but in reverent remembrance we can honor you, because we love you and miss you.

Always & Forever

Egregious Behavior

Matt & I both enjoy people-watching in public outings. Sometimes we sit at at a restraunt and say only a few words to each other during dinner, looking like an old married couple, but really we are just people-watching (or watching the game on the TV). Because seriously, after how long we've known each other, we sometimes just don't have much to talk about that doesn't revolve around work. (...maybe we are doing things in reverse, and in our golden years we will be chatting each other's ears off...). Anyway, this situation works for us, both being generally quite people.

Saturday we met up with a bunch of his work friends at Junior's, a bar downtown. Originally one of them was supposed to be set up on a "meet-&-greet-a-potential-love-interest", but the "love interest" didn't show. It worked out better that way. The pressure was off, and the drinking and pool playing was no longer going to be interrupted by the getting to know you games (so often pursued when two people are being set up by a third party).

We dominated the back part of the room, taking over the one and only pool table. Matt played most of the night, taking turns with the two other players, while the rest of us watched, drank, and chatted away. I didn't feel like playing pool, so I mostly drank and watched everyone else. There were a few people that it was my first time meeting, and so I was in observatory mode.

An hour into the festivities, the guy (we'll call him John) who was supposed to bring the "love interest", had another group of friends show up (2 girls, 1 guy). We didn't know them, and they didn't seem to be interested in meeting the rest of us (not all that shocking as I'll explain). The 4 of them were standing around talking, and I couldn't help but watch the group, as the blatant behaviors started to emerge. Oh, I'm sure the girls were behaving well with their words...I couldn't tell you for sure, as they were on the other side of the room where I couldn't hear. BUT I could see them. The poor guy they came with, desperately tried not to be left out of the conversation. However the girls' interest was all on John, and obviously so. They were looking straight at him, talking with him, only turning to the other guy when ab-so-lute-ly necessary. I watched one of the girls inparticular, and was very amused by her body language. She was leaning into the conversation she was having with John...head tilted down, but looking up at him smiling...mimicking his movements...repeatedly putting her hair behind her ear, or playing with it. All the classic signs of flirting that send the signal I'm totally into you, please, please, please notice!!! And John? He had the smile on, and the laid back posture not to give too much away up front (but really portrays the I'm not going to make it obvious that I'd go for you, but I totally would signal).

I couldn't help but laugh on the inside, and a little out loud, and pull Matt over to watch.

I laughed because it was so completely obvious. I laughed because I have been there, and was hoping I wasn't that obvious. I laughed because I'll never have to go through that every weekend, ever again, and I'm so very glad.

Now all I have to do is empty the sink trap

In the months I spent planning the wedding, I spent a lot of time on a Craigslist wedding forum. I got to know a lot of the girls on there pretty well (as well as you can know people who hang out in forums using pseudonym handles-which what you call screen names in forums). We discussed ideas, helped each other find deals, and sometimes discussed our grievances about our FHs (future husbands). It was there I was taught a very important lesson about relationships, that has saved me some aggrivation and frustration (hopefully making me a better spouse, even if just a little).

There was a day recently that I arrived home, and Matt had taken the initiative to clear our coffee/dining table off. Yes, it is our dining table too. If you've been to our apartment you know it wasn't built to have 2 people co-habitate, and for sure not to have space for a real table. (have you seen our one-butt kitchen, with 2 sq feet of counter space and oddly short cupboards? As in only one butt can fit in there at a time it's so tiny...). It looked nice and clean, and the front room was all picked up as well. My first thought was "and you didn't vacuum the floor because???". But I caught myself and thought back to this story told by one of the girls in the forum.

Jane noticed a pattern when Jack (her FH) did the dishes. He would wash them, dry them, even put them away...clean off the counters....but forget to empty the sink trap. She would get mad and tell him, it wasn't really cleaning up the kitchen if he didn't finish the job. She was frustrated, because no matter how many times she told him to please empty the trap, he never did. She realized after a few months that getting upset about it wasn't getting her anywhere. And, afterall, she felt bad because he was doing something nice by giving her a clean kitchen to come home to after her 10-12 hour work days. She realized he was just trying to make life easier for her, because she worked so much more than him. She decided to change her view to the proverbial glass is half full. The next time she came home to clean dishes and a dirty sink trap, she thought, "Sweet, now all I have to do is empty the sink trap!".


Since I was told that story I've tried to keep it a mantra in the back of my mind. So the night I came home to a clean table....I caught myself before I chastised him for not vacuuming, as my second thought immediately following was "now all I have to do is empty the sink trap". Because, after all, Matt was just trying to make my day easier knowing I was exhausted from being back at work. (I think I did say I'd vacuum, but haven't gotten to it yet...because of the combination of my laziness and tax return filing frying my brain).

I'm not perfect, and this doesn't happen every time, but I hope that this baby step is something that becomes a habit.

Sometimes family does know you best

During my recovery I slept a lot, and by a lot, I mean the first week or so I was awake at most 4 hours in a day. Granted, the sleep was pain and drug induced, and wasn't even close to refreshing.

For those not close to me, I'll let you know I am not a good sleeper. I have a very difficult time falling asleep, averaging over an hour to fall asleep, on a good night 6 hours of sleep, and run for the hills if you wake me up (because you will encounter my rage for waking me before I'm ready).... and if prematurely woken in the night, I'm usually done for and cannot fall back asleep. (Disclaimer: These rules did not apply when I was severely depressed, when I could fall asleep in an instant and sleep through anything short of a fire alarm. But being depressed wasn't exactly worth that benefit.)

Prior to the surgery I was extremely pleased with my success on a better sleep schedule, and felt like the world wasn't working against me. Much to the dismay of my loving husband, the 2+ weeks off work has royally screwed up any success I had made with my sleep schedule in the last 2.5 years we've lived together. I'm back to not falling asleep for at least 1.5 hours, and also now wake for no reason every 3.5-4 hours after falling asleep. Of course, that leaves me extremely tired while at work, and sometimes wondering if I've fallen asleep with my eyes open, sitting at my desk.

My lack of sleep, current and past, has been a source of contention in our relationship, mostly from me. As of right now, Matt is the only other person living with me, so he bears the burden if he wakes me up. He also hits the mattress and is out within 5, which makes me despise him sometimes, only because I'm jealous.

It's not that I'm not tired (I'm extremely exhausted), but it's like my brain doesn't shut off. Oh, and don't get me wrong I love sleep...if I get into a good sleep I will sleep for days if you let me. In my life I've tried everything to help: chamomile, music, sleeping pills, relaxing back scratches, etc. The emotional stress endured because of this is the excruciating part. I want want want, to fall asleep, so it feels like something is wrong with me. I don't know that I will ever overcome this, and it's extremely frustrating. I thought after the surgery, maybe my better breathing would help the sleep process, but it hasn't so far.

This leads me to the first few weeks my sister had her new baby. She said regarding the sleepless nights and constant waking for feedings and changes "I don't think Brianna will handle having a baby very well" (or something along those lines). I think she's right, so very, very right.

Sometimes your family are the ones who know you best :)

Just lowlights, but hey, I'm alive

So last Thursday (the 8th), I had my surgeries, and well, I survived. It didn't go as well as planned. For those who weren't well informed by myself (sorry), I had a tonsillectomy, a deviated septum repaired and cysts removed from my sinuses. So yes, that's 3 procedures done at one time. Well, I guess I'm a bleeder, so when I woke up the first time from the surgery I was bleeding still. All I remember is waking up coughing and choking and the anaesthesiologist getting mad at me for doing so...and thinking I can't really help it, I'm sorry!! My ENT was brought into post-op to look at me and they took me back into surgery to "clean up the bleeders". I remember being taken back in, and begging them to tell Matt where I was.

Waking up the second time was much more gruesome. Not only did the second round of anaesthetics within 6 hours make me very ill, I had swallowed a lot of my own blood after the first waking. (no wonder he was mad at me). I was puking up blood like it was nobody's business and had really high blood pressure. I had to really beg them to bring in Matt (and my Mom who was now in the waiting room). I think they finally gave in, hoping their presence would lower my blood pressure. It didn't, but I felt better having them there. I really don't remember much else besides my poor Husband and Mother trading off catching the blood in those little bean-shaped trays they give you for vomiting. They even gave me anti-nausea meds through my IV, but combined with my blood pressure, they admitted me overnight. (so I'm told...I only remember that I kept complaining about throwing up blood and the blood pressure cuff being way too tight, then being wheeled down a really long hallway into a room).

My Mom stayed overnight with me (as she is experienced with sleeping in hospitals), so Matt could go home and get some rest, since he'd be dealing with me for the next week. The night was rough, and painful, and IVs really are a pain! Every time I needed to get up to go to the bathroom I had to page the nurse to become unhooked from everything and drag the IV in there.

The next day I went home (finally!). And the next several days were lots of sleeping and trying to keep drinking liquids, even though my throat felt like someone took a sander to it, and swallowing felt like something I'd never done before. Monday's check-up was good at the doc's, even had an egg mcmuffin for brunch...then came Tuesday (shudders). Matt had to go back to work and the morning started okay with a smoothie, pills and water....but midway through the day I got very nauseated, and threw up. I was miserable and after a few hours of intense pain I gave in an called Matt to come home. EVERYYTHING I got in me, came back up that day/night and we had to call the doctor who called in and anti-nausea suppository (yes folks, grown ups have to use them too!) at midnight. It helped knock me out and the next day I was better.

The last few days have been painful as the scabs in my throat are falling off, but I've been doing okay. Lots of painkillers and sleeping. I went in again today and the doctor cleaned a lot of the gunk out of my nose, so I can breathe through it finally, but talking is very difficult. I have lost my sense of taste, but he assures me it will return soon, now that I can breathe through my nose. Let's hope so! I really like the taste of food, and would hope that I never lose it permanently!

I must say that I married a very patient and caring man who has taken very good care of me this last week plus! Thank you! I love you!

And to my Mom: I'm glad you were there to help me and Matt out with settling me in. Thank you! I love you!

To both: thank you for catching the blood I puked up, only true loved ones (or paid nurses) would put up with such a gruesome task and I will love you guys for your compassion in my time of complete need :)

I must go for now, as the pain killer is wearing off and the new one I will take will subsequently knock me out for the next hour at least! But I just wanted to give the details and update in case you don't hear it through the grapevine :)

Acting Brave

Today we gathered with my family for breakfast at the Belgian Waffle in Midvale. Dakota was her charming self & Clinton a little bit cranky, both quite impatient for food. We ordered Clinton their "Garbage Hash" and he loved it (even though it had peppers and mushrooms in it). It's surprising the things he eats now. On Christmas Eve I tried feeding him walnuts, which he loved and ate without complaint! At the care center they feed him prunes, and he loves them. Sometimes I forget, just like I grew up into liking certain things, so does he.

After breakfast, Matt and I headed downtown to go see Body Worlds 3. It was crowded, but having the right connections (i.e. a Mom who works there) got us through all the lines quicker. Matt had wanted to go for months now, but I had been really hesitant to go. The whole idea that these bodies were real people, creeped me out and made me very squeamish just thinking about it. But I braved up, like a real grown up would do, and we went to the exhibit.

I will tell you that it was really awe inspiring, but I still couldn't keep by stomach from twisting or shake the heeby-jeebies feeling from my back. I could handle the individual body parts just fine, it was the whole bodies posed that freaked me out, even once I was in there, but I acted brave and practiced my breathing methods so I didn't have an anxiety attack. The embryo room was amazing, but very sad (and they do state that to the best of their knowledge, none of them were ones that could be saved). I will say, the displays of all the arterial systems were the coolest things I ever saw. They preserve the arterial system first then dissolve the surrounding organs and/or tissue, and they end up with a complete map of the arterial system from that area. It's amazing how many blood vessels the human body has, and that they are in almost every space of the body.

So, I acted brave and got through it (but I won't lie and say I wasn't unabashedly glad to be out of there)!

I wonder how often parents must have to act brave to make their children feel at ease, when really they are scared or squeamish of something so trivial and silly like this?

I can't really act surprised...can I?!?!?

This year for New Year's Eve (as most years), we stayed in and celebrated in the warmth of our own house, watching the various countdown shows, and doing puzzles....because, well, we are lame like that...but we're okay with it. This year, I was actually enticed to go party, but with my surgery next week, I can't really risk getting sick.

With a minute left in 2008, we went out front on our porch, tried to decide what to follow- our cell phone clocks or the TV-and ended up counting down with the TV. We toasted, I with my champagne and Matt with his beer; then we kissed.

We had some spraklers to celebrate with (the heavy duty kind). I couldn't get mine to light and was holding the lighter quite close, so when it did light the flash burn took a quarter-sized layer of skin off..not bad, but painful. So there you have it, a minute into 2009 and my accident-prone self was injured! I can't really act surprised can I?!?!?